I Hate and Love... now with 99% less personal angst and twice the awesomeness!
Monday, June 1, 2009
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Endings
I won't be updating this blog anymore.
If you are my friend, don't worry, I'm not going anywhere.
If you don't know me and just read my blog, then this really is the end of the line.
This blog has been both good and bad for me. I've shared my disappointments and triumphs with the world. I've vented about frustrations and broken hearts. I've shared my feelings and opinions on a lot of topics.
Perhaps I've put too much of myself into "I Hate and Love." I don't want to post to it anymore. I don't even want to have to think that I should post to it. Hence, this post.
Closure. Create it when you can, because sometimes you just can't.
If you are my friend, don't worry, I'm not going anywhere.
If you don't know me and just read my blog, then this really is the end of the line.
This blog has been both good and bad for me. I've shared my disappointments and triumphs with the world. I've vented about frustrations and broken hearts. I've shared my feelings and opinions on a lot of topics.
Perhaps I've put too much of myself into "I Hate and Love." I don't want to post to it anymore. I don't even want to have to think that I should post to it. Hence, this post.
Closure. Create it when you can, because sometimes you just can't.
Sunday, September 2, 2007
Scrutiny
Going into Canada is nice and easy. Sometimes they don't even check your ID. They ask you where you live, what your business in Canada is, and (sometimes) if you have any weapons. Coming out of Canada back into the US is another story.
Customs and Border Protection agents are some of the most irritating people I have ever met. They get your ID, ask you a bunch of dumb questions, scowl at you, sometimes search your car, and then finally let you go.
This is one reason why I applied for a NEXUS card. With the NEXUS card, they prescreen people by doing background checks. Then when you get to a border crossing, they don't try to size you up with their stupid behavioral analysis. The questions are cut to a bare minimum.
Then again, I also applied for a NEXUS card because it's biometric. They store your fingerprints and retina scan. I've always wanted to get a retina scan. It's teh futar. Some people may not like the government having so much data on them, but I figure I'm so on the grid at this point that it doesn't matter much anyway.
Customs and Border Protection agents are some of the most irritating people I have ever met. They get your ID, ask you a bunch of dumb questions, scowl at you, sometimes search your car, and then finally let you go.
This is one reason why I applied for a NEXUS card. With the NEXUS card, they prescreen people by doing background checks. Then when you get to a border crossing, they don't try to size you up with their stupid behavioral analysis. The questions are cut to a bare minimum.
Then again, I also applied for a NEXUS card because it's biometric. They store your fingerprints and retina scan. I've always wanted to get a retina scan. It's teh futar. Some people may not like the government having so much data on them, but I figure I'm so on the grid at this point that it doesn't matter much anyway.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Technology
I've been in this unnerved state for the past couple days. I blame technology.
See, I did an online transfer of almost all of my money from one bank account to another. I was told this would take a few days, as it had to go to a completely different bank. The issue is that the money almost immediately went out of the transferring account, but it has yet to arrive in the receiving account. I have full confidence it will be there in a day or two, but it's a little bothersome, knowing I have a large amount of money just sitting somewhere, between my accounts, in the void of technology. My money temporarily doesn't exist. Well, it does and it doesn't.
Whether money stored in accounts technically exists at all is debatable. I may have a million dollars in my bank account (don't I wish...), but that doesn't mean the bank actually has my million dollars. Lots of people have my million dollars. People who are overdrafted have my money. People with home, auto, and personal loans have my money. When I have money in the bank, basically everyone but me has my money. That's why banks pay interest. They're using my money, so they're paying me.
But back to technology... Another thing that bothers me about all this computerized banking is the fact that when I make purchases or withdrawls, the bank immediately takes my money, but when I make a deposit or get credited, it can take up to a week. It's the same technology. They don't seem to have a problem moving money when it benefits them, so why does everything slow down when it benefits me?
Money is annoying.
See, I did an online transfer of almost all of my money from one bank account to another. I was told this would take a few days, as it had to go to a completely different bank. The issue is that the money almost immediately went out of the transferring account, but it has yet to arrive in the receiving account. I have full confidence it will be there in a day or two, but it's a little bothersome, knowing I have a large amount of money just sitting somewhere, between my accounts, in the void of technology. My money temporarily doesn't exist. Well, it does and it doesn't.
Whether money stored in accounts technically exists at all is debatable. I may have a million dollars in my bank account (don't I wish...), but that doesn't mean the bank actually has my million dollars. Lots of people have my million dollars. People who are overdrafted have my money. People with home, auto, and personal loans have my money. When I have money in the bank, basically everyone but me has my money. That's why banks pay interest. They're using my money, so they're paying me.
But back to technology... Another thing that bothers me about all this computerized banking is the fact that when I make purchases or withdrawls, the bank immediately takes my money, but when I make a deposit or get credited, it can take up to a week. It's the same technology. They don't seem to have a problem moving money when it benefits them, so why does everything slow down when it benefits me?
Money is annoying.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
It's Just A Computer
Dear Mac Users,
It's not a status symbol. It's not a social movement. It's not a protest statement. It's just a computer. I promise.
You are not "counter-culture" because you bought a Mac. You are not "sticking it to the man". Every dollar you avoided putting into Bill Gates' pocket instead went into Steve Jobs'.
There are some nice things about Mac. Then again, there are also some nice things about Windows (and other operating systems). I'm not going to list the pros and cons. If you're computer shopping, you can do that yourself.
Buy the computer that will suit your needs the best, however, don't feel like you're some sort of higher being if you bought a Mac. By doing so, you would only validate the Macintosh advertising campaign. And believing advertising only strengthens capitalism. The type of capitalism that put Microsoft on the top of the computer business. Just a thought.
With No Hard Feelings,
Rae
It's not a status symbol. It's not a social movement. It's not a protest statement. It's just a computer. I promise.
You are not "counter-culture" because you bought a Mac. You are not "sticking it to the man". Every dollar you avoided putting into Bill Gates' pocket instead went into Steve Jobs'.
There are some nice things about Mac. Then again, there are also some nice things about Windows (and other operating systems). I'm not going to list the pros and cons. If you're computer shopping, you can do that yourself.
Buy the computer that will suit your needs the best, however, don't feel like you're some sort of higher being if you bought a Mac. By doing so, you would only validate the Macintosh advertising campaign. And believing advertising only strengthens capitalism. The type of capitalism that put Microsoft on the top of the computer business. Just a thought.
With No Hard Feelings,
Rae
Condescension
I went to this theological discussion group at my church yesterday afternoon (I had nothing better to do) with a friend. I expected to have an interesting conversation (perhaps) and then leave, maybe being a little less bored than I had been when I arrived.
I certainly was less bored when I left, but only because I was annoyed. You see, my friend and I are teenagers. Everyone else at the lunch was over the age of 40 (perhaps even 50). Usually, what happened when someone said something is that a lively discussion would ensue. The thing was, whenever I or my friend said anything, people just kind of ignored it and continued on with whatever they had been talking about before.
After the lunch, a few people came up to us, and in an incredibly condescending manner, told us how nice it had been to have us there. It was sort of a "you're a credit to your race/gender" thing, though in this case I suppose it would be more like, "you're a credit to people your age."
If they had really valued us as members of the discussion, their actions during the lunch would have proved it, not some little condescending remark afterwards.
I'm sick of adults thinking teenagers have nothing of value to add to the world. Thankfully, I have about 6 more months of this teenager gig before I "graduate" to being a "20-something".
I certainly was less bored when I left, but only because I was annoyed. You see, my friend and I are teenagers. Everyone else at the lunch was over the age of 40 (perhaps even 50). Usually, what happened when someone said something is that a lively discussion would ensue. The thing was, whenever I or my friend said anything, people just kind of ignored it and continued on with whatever they had been talking about before.
After the lunch, a few people came up to us, and in an incredibly condescending manner, told us how nice it had been to have us there. It was sort of a "you're a credit to your race/gender" thing, though in this case I suppose it would be more like, "you're a credit to people your age."
If they had really valued us as members of the discussion, their actions during the lunch would have proved it, not some little condescending remark afterwards.
I'm sick of adults thinking teenagers have nothing of value to add to the world. Thankfully, I have about 6 more months of this teenager gig before I "graduate" to being a "20-something".
Monday, August 6, 2007
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Friday, July 13, 2007
Sigrid Halstead
The AE campaign I was participating in recently ended. It finished on a good note, and I'm pleased with the entire experience overall. I'm just a little sad that it's actually over.
I'm especially happy with the character (Sigrid Halstead) I developed over the course of the campaign. There were a few issues with party "cohesion" with her at the beginning, but I and the DM (Oddysey) altered her somewhat to fit better, and I made a few decisions that made her easier to play.
I changed her from being focused on the concept of justice to being focused on the concept of loyalty. I'm not sure if loyalty is really more or less "gray" than justice, but it worked well for her. It gave me a little more room to play around. I also decided that she has a bit of a one-track-mind. I don't know how much I allowed this to show in play, but it allowed me to have her just obsess over one thing (such as rescuing one particular NPC... repeatedly), while the rest of the party could do stuff like poisoning people and backstabbing each other with minimal interference from Sigrid (who really is a bit of a goody-goody).
I put a lot of thought and depth into her (again, I don't know how much of that showed up during sessions). I thought a lot not just about what she would do in a given situation, but why she would do it, what her thought process was, and how it would make her feel afterwards. I usually only do that type of character development in my own writing, not in roleplaying. I really felt the "collaborative fiction" thing this campaign more than I usually do.
Every other campaign I've ever ended, I've just sorta said, "Yay! Campaign ending!" and didn't put a lot of thought into what my character would do next. Granted, I've only ended five campaigns total (as far as I remember).
One finished campaign was Outlaws, a sci-fi campaign in D20 modern. My character in that was Rae (where have I heard that name before...?). She's probably the second most developed character I've ever played (after Sigrid). She was an android. There was much "robot angst". She also spent a lot of time worrying about purpose, much as Sigrid did. I didn't spend any out-of-game time developing her character, so she wasn't as much of a round, deep character as Sigrid. At the end of the Outlaws campaign, I basically said, "Yay! We're going to space! Campaign over!" and didn't think much about her again until we attempted an Outlaws revisit.
Another completed campaign was an Underdark game I did with my regular group. I did absolutely no character development whatsoever. I don't remember my character name and I can't even recall what class she was. I remember events in that campaign, and I remember that it was a lot of fun, but my character was less than memorable. I didn't really bother thinking about her again after the campaign because she wasn't very ingrained in my mind, and she died in a giant explosion at the end of the game.
There was another Underdark campaign I played with my school group that was completed. I literally had no character development whatsoever. Literally. The DM had a set cast of characters (along with their character sheets) and we each got to pick one. Also, we were playing members of Drizzt's family and our campaign objective was to go to the surface world, find Drizzt and his party, and kill them. I was Drizzt's stepmother and a House Matron. I was insanely powerful. I could literally do whatever I wanted. There was no dice rolling. The game sucked immensely, but it was completed. I never thought about that character ever again, because she angered me immensely and reminded me of that terrible campaign. I also never played DnD with that group again.
The last campaign I completed was a very short KordCon* campaign. My character was a cleric(?) who wielded a greatsword and forgot to pack any ranged weapons (d'oh!). The campaign involved killing an evil necromancer(?), but we got to the final battle and tried to invite her to join us instead. There wasn't a lot of character development because it was a short campaign, and it was KordCon.
So, character development is not essential for a successful and enjoyable game, but it did significantly enhance my experience this time around. I'm happy there was resolution in the game, but it's bittersweet. I'm going to continue writing in this world with her for awhile, perhaps writing stuff from her earlier life, or maybe even writing stuff "in teh future". I don't really need to write anymore stuff that happened during the actual campaign, as that's already very well documented in her (over 50-pages incomplete) journal. I've been half-thinking about writing a short campaign epilogue, but I don't really want to muss with other people's characters too much.
I liked this campaign. I like this character. I would love to do a revisit at some point in the future, maybe several game years later. I wouldn't want to play Sigrid again though. It'd be interesting to meet our old characters as NPCs though.
*KordCon - DnD players. Imagine a convention of Kord worshippers. There would be much drinking and hitting of things (in the name of Kord). Now imagine that this con is used as an adventure hook (you don't meet at a bloody tavern, you meet at KordCon). This leads to much fun.
I'm especially happy with the character (Sigrid Halstead) I developed over the course of the campaign. There were a few issues with party "cohesion" with her at the beginning, but I and the DM (Oddysey) altered her somewhat to fit better, and I made a few decisions that made her easier to play.
I changed her from being focused on the concept of justice to being focused on the concept of loyalty. I'm not sure if loyalty is really more or less "gray" than justice, but it worked well for her. It gave me a little more room to play around. I also decided that she has a bit of a one-track-mind. I don't know how much I allowed this to show in play, but it allowed me to have her just obsess over one thing (such as rescuing one particular NPC... repeatedly), while the rest of the party could do stuff like poisoning people and backstabbing each other with minimal interference from Sigrid (who really is a bit of a goody-goody).
I put a lot of thought and depth into her (again, I don't know how much of that showed up during sessions). I thought a lot not just about what she would do in a given situation, but why she would do it, what her thought process was, and how it would make her feel afterwards. I usually only do that type of character development in my own writing, not in roleplaying. I really felt the "collaborative fiction" thing this campaign more than I usually do.
Every other campaign I've ever ended, I've just sorta said, "Yay! Campaign ending!" and didn't put a lot of thought into what my character would do next. Granted, I've only ended five campaigns total (as far as I remember).
One finished campaign was Outlaws, a sci-fi campaign in D20 modern. My character in that was Rae (where have I heard that name before...?). She's probably the second most developed character I've ever played (after Sigrid). She was an android. There was much "robot angst". She also spent a lot of time worrying about purpose, much as Sigrid did. I didn't spend any out-of-game time developing her character, so she wasn't as much of a round, deep character as Sigrid. At the end of the Outlaws campaign, I basically said, "Yay! We're going to space! Campaign over!" and didn't think much about her again until we attempted an Outlaws revisit.
Another completed campaign was an Underdark game I did with my regular group. I did absolutely no character development whatsoever. I don't remember my character name and I can't even recall what class she was. I remember events in that campaign, and I remember that it was a lot of fun, but my character was less than memorable. I didn't really bother thinking about her again after the campaign because she wasn't very ingrained in my mind, and she died in a giant explosion at the end of the game.
There was another Underdark campaign I played with my school group that was completed. I literally had no character development whatsoever. Literally. The DM had a set cast of characters (along with their character sheets) and we each got to pick one. Also, we were playing members of Drizzt's family and our campaign objective was to go to the surface world, find Drizzt and his party, and kill them. I was Drizzt's stepmother and a House Matron. I was insanely powerful. I could literally do whatever I wanted. There was no dice rolling. The game sucked immensely, but it was completed. I never thought about that character ever again, because she angered me immensely and reminded me of that terrible campaign. I also never played DnD with that group again.
The last campaign I completed was a very short KordCon* campaign. My character was a cleric(?) who wielded a greatsword and forgot to pack any ranged weapons (d'oh!). The campaign involved killing an evil necromancer(?), but we got to the final battle and tried to invite her to join us instead. There wasn't a lot of character development because it was a short campaign, and it was KordCon.
So, character development is not essential for a successful and enjoyable game, but it did significantly enhance my experience this time around. I'm happy there was resolution in the game, but it's bittersweet. I'm going to continue writing in this world with her for awhile, perhaps writing stuff from her earlier life, or maybe even writing stuff "in teh future". I don't really need to write anymore stuff that happened during the actual campaign, as that's already very well documented in her (over 50-pages incomplete) journal. I've been half-thinking about writing a short campaign epilogue, but I don't really want to muss with other people's characters too much.
I liked this campaign. I like this character. I would love to do a revisit at some point in the future, maybe several game years later. I wouldn't want to play Sigrid again though. It'd be interesting to meet our old characters as NPCs though.
*KordCon - DnD players. Imagine a convention of Kord worshippers. There would be much drinking and hitting of things (in the name of Kord). Now imagine that this con is used as an adventure hook (you don't meet at a bloody tavern, you meet at KordCon). This leads to much fun.
Sunday, July 8, 2007
"The Rules"
Don't accept a drink from a stranger. Don't walk alone after dark. Don't wear revealing clothing. Keep an eye on your drinks at all times. Don't get in a vehicle with someone you barely know. Don't act vaguely sexual towards a man. Etcetera. Etcetera. Etcetera. All common sense safety tips to prevent being sexually assaulted, right? Then why the hell do I hate them so much?
In an ideal society, we wouldn't need "the rules". Women could behave like rational human beings instead of paranoid pre-victims. Unfortunately, when it comes to "the rules", that's what women are: pre-victims or even more tragically, actual victims. So, do I hate the rules because I feel it's incredibly sad that we have to have them? Yes, but there's more to it as well.
I don't like the subtle implication of "the rules". To me, "the rules" imply that if you don't follow "the rules" and get raped, it's you're fault, because you were "obviously acting like an oblivious slut." "The rules" have this undertone within them that rape is the victim's fault. I hate that. Victims start questioning themselves. "Well, if I had watched my drink better, maybe I wouldn't have gotten drugged." "Maybe I should have taken the bus instead of walking home alone at night."
"Did I lead my boyfriend on?"
Victims have to live with enough after an assault. They shouldn't have to live with the belief that their rape was their own fault. It's not the victim's fault. It's like if someone was hit by a drunk driver and later thought, "Well, if I'd just left the house five minutes later I might not have been in that accident." The only person that should be blamed in that scenario is the drunk driver, not the other driver. Just as the only person to be blamed in a sexual assault is the assailant, not the victim.
How often were you told never to drive drunk? If your life experiences have been anything like mine, you have been told not to drink and drive hundreds and hundreds of times. But how often have you been told not to drive because there might be drunk people on the road? I've only been told that a handful of times. But still, I hear "the rules" over and over again. But I rarely hear anyone saying the sexual assault equivalent to "don't drink and drive." It is a very rare occurrence when I hear someone say "Don't rape women. It's not okay."
Why is that something we don't teach our sons? Is it that we feel we teach them a set of morals that implies to them that rape is wrong? Do we really though? What traits do people really instill in their sons? Stereotypically, men are "supposed to" be masculine and manly. They're "supposed to" be strong and rugged. They "shouldn't" cry or express feelings. They "should like" watching movies with scantily clad women and lots of violence. Men are "supposed to" get laid a lot. Being really sexual "makes you more of a man". "It's okay" to degrade women by saying things like "son of a bitch" and "bros before hos". If they don't do these things, "they're obviously" pussies or fags. I completely disagree with everything I just said about what a man should be, but I was trying to showcase the societal expectations of men.
With that in mind, it's rather easy to see that that those sorts of societal expectations don't really tell men not to rape women. We live in a violent, sexualized culture. Rape is, unfortunately, a part of that.
So, even though I hate "the rules", I understand the necessity of them. After all, I suppose it's better to be a paranoid pre-victim than an actual, tragic victim. But really, we're all victimized by rape. Men get raped too, but even the ones that haven't been raped are victims of the rape-fearful culture. While women have to play the part of paranoid pre-victim, all men will sadly be seen as possible rapists.
I don't think there's any part of rape that isn't tragic.
In an ideal society, we wouldn't need "the rules". Women could behave like rational human beings instead of paranoid pre-victims. Unfortunately, when it comes to "the rules", that's what women are: pre-victims or even more tragically, actual victims. So, do I hate the rules because I feel it's incredibly sad that we have to have them? Yes, but there's more to it as well.
I don't like the subtle implication of "the rules". To me, "the rules" imply that if you don't follow "the rules" and get raped, it's you're fault, because you were "obviously acting like an oblivious slut." "The rules" have this undertone within them that rape is the victim's fault. I hate that. Victims start questioning themselves. "Well, if I had watched my drink better, maybe I wouldn't have gotten drugged." "Maybe I should have taken the bus instead of walking home alone at night."
"Did I lead my boyfriend on?"
Victims have to live with enough after an assault. They shouldn't have to live with the belief that their rape was their own fault. It's not the victim's fault. It's like if someone was hit by a drunk driver and later thought, "Well, if I'd just left the house five minutes later I might not have been in that accident." The only person that should be blamed in that scenario is the drunk driver, not the other driver. Just as the only person to be blamed in a sexual assault is the assailant, not the victim.
How often were you told never to drive drunk? If your life experiences have been anything like mine, you have been told not to drink and drive hundreds and hundreds of times. But how often have you been told not to drive because there might be drunk people on the road? I've only been told that a handful of times. But still, I hear "the rules" over and over again. But I rarely hear anyone saying the sexual assault equivalent to "don't drink and drive." It is a very rare occurrence when I hear someone say "Don't rape women. It's not okay."
Why is that something we don't teach our sons? Is it that we feel we teach them a set of morals that implies to them that rape is wrong? Do we really though? What traits do people really instill in their sons? Stereotypically, men are "supposed to" be masculine and manly. They're "supposed to" be strong and rugged. They "shouldn't" cry or express feelings. They "should like" watching movies with scantily clad women and lots of violence. Men are "supposed to" get laid a lot. Being really sexual "makes you more of a man". "It's okay" to degrade women by saying things like "son of a bitch" and "bros before hos". If they don't do these things, "they're obviously" pussies or fags. I completely disagree with everything I just said about what a man should be, but I was trying to showcase the societal expectations of men.
With that in mind, it's rather easy to see that that those sorts of societal expectations don't really tell men not to rape women. We live in a violent, sexualized culture. Rape is, unfortunately, a part of that.
So, even though I hate "the rules", I understand the necessity of them. After all, I suppose it's better to be a paranoid pre-victim than an actual, tragic victim. But really, we're all victimized by rape. Men get raped too, but even the ones that haven't been raped are victims of the rape-fearful culture. While women have to play the part of paranoid pre-victim, all men will sadly be seen as possible rapists.
I don't think there's any part of rape that isn't tragic.
Saturday, July 7, 2007
Mediocrity and Apathy
Because of conversations and speeches given at my university orientation in May, I've been thinking a lot about my strengths, passions, and interests. The more I've thought about it, though, the more I realize I'm not really notably talented with much of anything.
When I was a kid, I had a superiority complex like you would not believe. I was convinced that I was the best at everything I did. That idea slowly slipped away as I got older. I knew I was incredibly intelligent. I would raise my hand all the time and get perfect scores on everything. Then I got into GT. I was no longer perfect academically. But I was still the tallest kid in my class (which I had been since preschool). Then one of my classmates had a growth spurt. But I still had my flute. I was the best musician in my entire elementary school band. I got this county-wide award in 6th grade. Then in middle school, there were a lot of people that were just so much better than me. Late elementary school and middle school taught me that I simply wasn't as good as I thought I was.
I know I'm more intelligent than the average person, but I'm not as bright as some people some to think. I struggled with math in high school. There were things in chemistry and physics that I still do not understand. I cannot do comp sci for the life of me.
Some of my feelings stem from the fact that I surround myself with extraordinary people. I have friends that are incredible artists, talented writers, brilliant mathematicians, inspired actors, crazy programmers and awesome musicians. I have stuff that I'm okay at, but I'm definitely not amazingly good at anything.
I don't consider myself to have any particularly noticeable natural talents. I know that practice and studying are a big part of being good at stuff as well, but I always run into problems there too.
There's not really much that I'm really interested in and passionate about anymore. I don't really like doing much of anything lately. I like writing, but I'm not great at it. I like roleplaying, but there's really not anything I can do with that on an academic/career level. For awhile, I was pretty certain I wanted to study psychology and maybe go into social work. Now I'm not so sure. I don't like being around children as much as I used to.
So, I guess my current plan is just to go to college and figure it all out there. Maybe being in a different environment with lots of cool academic, social, and recreational opportunities will help me figure out what I really like doing. I really hope it does. I don't want to feel this passionless anymore.
When I was a kid, I had a superiority complex like you would not believe. I was convinced that I was the best at everything I did. That idea slowly slipped away as I got older. I knew I was incredibly intelligent. I would raise my hand all the time and get perfect scores on everything. Then I got into GT. I was no longer perfect academically. But I was still the tallest kid in my class (which I had been since preschool). Then one of my classmates had a growth spurt. But I still had my flute. I was the best musician in my entire elementary school band. I got this county-wide award in 6th grade. Then in middle school, there were a lot of people that were just so much better than me. Late elementary school and middle school taught me that I simply wasn't as good as I thought I was.
I know I'm more intelligent than the average person, but I'm not as bright as some people some to think. I struggled with math in high school. There were things in chemistry and physics that I still do not understand. I cannot do comp sci for the life of me.
Some of my feelings stem from the fact that I surround myself with extraordinary people. I have friends that are incredible artists, talented writers, brilliant mathematicians, inspired actors, crazy programmers and awesome musicians. I have stuff that I'm okay at, but I'm definitely not amazingly good at anything.
I don't consider myself to have any particularly noticeable natural talents. I know that practice and studying are a big part of being good at stuff as well, but I always run into problems there too.
There's not really much that I'm really interested in and passionate about anymore. I don't really like doing much of anything lately. I like writing, but I'm not great at it. I like roleplaying, but there's really not anything I can do with that on an academic/career level. For awhile, I was pretty certain I wanted to study psychology and maybe go into social work. Now I'm not so sure. I don't like being around children as much as I used to.
So, I guess my current plan is just to go to college and figure it all out there. Maybe being in a different environment with lots of cool academic, social, and recreational opportunities will help me figure out what I really like doing. I really hope it does. I don't want to feel this passionless anymore.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Greetings from my DS
I bought the Opera browser for Nintendo DS. Now I'm posting to my blog from my DS. This is so awesome.
Monday, July 2, 2007
Sounds Like Childhood
I was at Oddysey's house yesterday and (for a reason that would really take far too long to explain) she put on a Backstreet Boys song. I, of course, could sing along with every word. I remember being 10 years old in 5th grade "rocking out" to the Backstreet Boys. Good times.
Anyway, I got home and immediately started digging around in my old CDs, looking for a Backstreet Boys CD. The only one I found was "The Hits: Volume 1". I've been listening for quite a while today (remembering every lyric). The music really isn't that good, but something about it just makes me smile, because it sounds like childhood. It reminds me of that awesome preteen time in my life.
Ten was amazing.
Also, a note: Don't try to over-analyze Backstreet Boys lyrics. It doesn't work.
Anyway, I got home and immediately started digging around in my old CDs, looking for a Backstreet Boys CD. The only one I found was "The Hits: Volume 1". I've been listening for quite a while today (remembering every lyric). The music really isn't that good, but something about it just makes me smile, because it sounds like childhood. It reminds me of that awesome preteen time in my life.
Ten was amazing.
Also, a note: Don't try to over-analyze Backstreet Boys lyrics. It doesn't work.
Sunday, July 1, 2007
No Vampires Need Apply
I've been working on a new DnD campaign lately. It's sort of a political thing where there's a bunch of different factions vying for control of the kingdom. It's really interesting.
One of my factions was going to be a group of vampires, but as I started developing the factions more, I realized that the vampires weren't meshing well. In my campaign, the PCs will get to pick who they help (with some twists, I assure you) based upon the factions' and the PCs' motivations. The vampiric faction's motivation is to take control of the kingdom and brutishly dominate the humanoid races. There's absolutely no reason any PC would ally with them (unless they were completely insane, and I do know a few insane players...).
So, I changed the vampires up a bit. Maybe they could be there to simply be antagonistic enemies. The more I thought about that plan, however, the less it worked. Having a group of bloodcrazed vampires trying to take over the kingdom would detract from the main plot quite a bit. It might even create alliances within the other factions to fight against the vampires (which would change the main plot from being "cool political intrigue with twists" to "kill the vampires", which is not the direction I wanted to go).
I decided it would be best for the campaign to just let the vampire faction go away. DnD doesn't seem to work well with vampires anyway, for some reason. Baldur's Gate 2 did a good job with vampires, but that's an exception. Baldur's Gate 2 did a good job with everything.
I do have one idea to keep a vampiric presence within the game without completely destroying it. All I will say is that it will be humourous.
One of my factions was going to be a group of vampires, but as I started developing the factions more, I realized that the vampires weren't meshing well. In my campaign, the PCs will get to pick who they help (with some twists, I assure you) based upon the factions' and the PCs' motivations. The vampiric faction's motivation is to take control of the kingdom and brutishly dominate the humanoid races. There's absolutely no reason any PC would ally with them (unless they were completely insane, and I do know a few insane players...).
So, I changed the vampires up a bit. Maybe they could be there to simply be antagonistic enemies. The more I thought about that plan, however, the less it worked. Having a group of bloodcrazed vampires trying to take over the kingdom would detract from the main plot quite a bit. It might even create alliances within the other factions to fight against the vampires (which would change the main plot from being "cool political intrigue with twists" to "kill the vampires", which is not the direction I wanted to go).
I decided it would be best for the campaign to just let the vampire faction go away. DnD doesn't seem to work well with vampires anyway, for some reason. Baldur's Gate 2 did a good job with vampires, but that's an exception. Baldur's Gate 2 did a good job with everything.
I do have one idea to keep a vampiric presence within the game without completely destroying it. All I will say is that it will be humourous.
Saturday, June 30, 2007
Lawless Gay People
Sometimes, something I read/see makes me go, "What the hell is wrong with you people!?" This is certainly one of those times.
Go look at this Feministe post. Make sure you watch the video.
Go look at this Feministe post. Make sure you watch the video.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Chain Story
At work today we did a writing exercise with the 3rd graders. One child would write one sentence of a story, then pass it to the next kid, who would add a sentence and so on and so forth. It's called a chain story. They did a pretty good job. It was a little incoherent, but they're eight years old, so I suppose that's to be expected. However, this got me to thinking...
What if I wrote a chain story? Obviously, I would need other people to do it with, but I think it could be a lot of fun. I write all the damn time nowadays anyway. I think if I did it with people, it could be via email or something. I guess it would probably also be by paragraph or page and not by sentence.
It would add a new challenge to my writing. I already have certain characters *ahem*Rylie*ahem that are severely resistant to the course of actions I write them into. It would be quite fun if characters ACTUALLY did things I didn't want them to or expect (through another author). It would also force me to deal with unexpected plot twists.
I'd need a willing group of participants, so this probably will never happen, but it would be cool if it could.
What if I wrote a chain story? Obviously, I would need other people to do it with, but I think it could be a lot of fun. I write all the damn time nowadays anyway. I think if I did it with people, it could be via email or something. I guess it would probably also be by paragraph or page and not by sentence.
It would add a new challenge to my writing. I already have certain characters *ahem*Rylie*ahem that are severely resistant to the course of actions I write them into. It would be quite fun if characters ACTUALLY did things I didn't want them to or expect (through another author). It would also force me to deal with unexpected plot twists.
I'd need a willing group of participants, so this probably will never happen, but it would be cool if it could.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Chivalry: "Beneficial" Sexism?
I was talking to one of my male friends this morning online about feminism. He made a really dumb statement which prompted me to write a blog entry.
"A lot of sexism benefits women, like chivalry. Why do you complain so much?"
Ugggh.
I don't believe in chivalry. I don't expect men to open doors for me. I don't expect men to pay for me. I don't expect men on public transportation to give up their seat for me. I don't want waiters pulling out chairs for me in fancy restaurants.
But why should I complain about any of this? Chivalry obviously benefits me as a woman, doesn't it? Hell no.
Chivalry goes back to a time when women weren't really seen as people, but as objects of adoration. Knights were expected to act a certain way with women, because they were weak and silly and needed special treatment. Apparently, the way to woo a woman was to treat her as if she were helpless. The whole thing kind of reminds me of pet ownership. Pets are, in today's society, seen as property (at least legally). To get a pet to like you, you give it treats, pet it, and play with it.
Chivalry just reminds me of a time when women were seen only as property, which is why it bugs me so much. And besides, sexism and misogyny in any form doesn't benefit anyone.
I believe in general politeness, but not with a gender bias. Whoever gets to a door first should hold it open. People should pay for their own things, unless one person (of EITHER gender) wishes to pay. You should as easily give up your bus seat to a man as you should a woman.
So, let us get the door once in awhile and start treating us like we're actual humans too.
~Feminism is the radical notion that women are people.~
"A lot of sexism benefits women, like chivalry. Why do you complain so much?"
Ugggh.
I don't believe in chivalry. I don't expect men to open doors for me. I don't expect men to pay for me. I don't expect men on public transportation to give up their seat for me. I don't want waiters pulling out chairs for me in fancy restaurants.
But why should I complain about any of this? Chivalry obviously benefits me as a woman, doesn't it? Hell no.
Chivalry goes back to a time when women weren't really seen as people, but as objects of adoration. Knights were expected to act a certain way with women, because they were weak and silly and needed special treatment. Apparently, the way to woo a woman was to treat her as if she were helpless. The whole thing kind of reminds me of pet ownership. Pets are, in today's society, seen as property (at least legally). To get a pet to like you, you give it treats, pet it, and play with it.
Chivalry just reminds me of a time when women were seen only as property, which is why it bugs me so much. And besides, sexism and misogyny in any form doesn't benefit anyone.
I believe in general politeness, but not with a gender bias. Whoever gets to a door first should hold it open. People should pay for their own things, unless one person (of EITHER gender) wishes to pay. You should as easily give up your bus seat to a man as you should a woman.
So, let us get the door once in awhile and start treating us like we're actual humans too.
~Feminism is the radical notion that women are people.~
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Sidewalk of Life
This is definitely not mine. A friend emailed it to be and I traced it back to it's author, Portia Nelson. I liked it, so I decided to post it.
Chapter I
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost--I am helpless--it isn’t my fault. . . . .
It takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter II
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place--but it isn’t my fault. . . .
It still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter III
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in . . . It is a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
Chapter IV
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
Chapter V
I walk down another street.
Chapter I
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost--I am helpless--it isn’t my fault. . . . .
It takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter II
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place--but it isn’t my fault. . . .
It still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter III
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in . . . It is a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
Chapter IV
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
Chapter V
I walk down another street.
Monday, June 18, 2007
If My Life Were a Movie
I got this off of Qwerty's blog. It's a meme.
Essentially, you put your iPod, Mp3 player, or entire music library on shuffle, and fill in the blanks.
He added his commentary, so I shall add my own.
My Life: Soundtrack to the Motion Picture
Essentially, you put your iPod, Mp3 player, or entire music library on shuffle, and fill in the blanks.
He added his commentary, so I shall add my own.
My Life: Soundtrack to the Motion Picture
Opening Credits:
“Nothing in My Way” by Keane
A song about someone hurting a lot inside and lying about it to the world. That's rather sad...
Waking Up:
"Headlock” by Imogen Heap
A song about someone afraid to live their life that instead hides from the world. Again, sad...
First Day at School:
"So Hard” by the Dixie Chicks
This song is about how things never come easily.
Falling in Love:
“Heaven Forbid” by The Fray
A song about a 20 year-old that's depressed because they're all alone.
Breaking Up:
“Nobody Loves You” by Garbage
No explanation needed.
Prom:
“Valentine's Day” by Linkin Park
Sounds positive, until you realize that it's about someone angsting that they're all alone on V-day.
Life's Okay:
“Bent” by Matchbox Twenty
A song about asking for help.
Mental Breakdown:
“Personal Jesus” by Depeche Mode (covered by Marilyn Manson)
Hmm.. don't have too much to say about this one.
Driving:
"Ocean's Soul” by Nightwish
A song about a woman contemplating suicide by drowning herself in the ocean. Yeah... I don't contemplate suicide while driving (or at all anymore). I do do a lot of thinking about stuff while driving though.
Flashback:
"Stuck in a Moment You Can't Get Out Of” by U2
So very true...
Getting Back Together:
“Broken Toy” by Keane
A song about how people change and sometimes things don't work out.
Wedding:
“Cup of Coffee” by Garbage
A song about a sudden break up and the dumpee's subsequent depression.
Birth of Child:
“Kody” by Matchbox Twenty
I think this song implies my child dies.
Final Battle:
“Up is Down” from Pirates of the Caribbean
Nothing is what it seems. Approach situations from different angles. Coincidentally one of my favorite “Pirates” songs.
Death Scene:
“Holding out for a Hero” by Bonnie Tyler (covered by Frou Frou)
I think I was holding off an evil villain until some hero could get there.
Funeral Song:
“Leave Out All the Rest” by Linkin Park
A song about making a mark on the world and wanting to be remembered for something. Maybe it was for dying a hero.
End Credits:
“Parade” by Garbage
Do what you think you should to make your mark and live your life to the fullest. Apparently my depressing movie life had an important lesson for people.
To summarize:
I think my movie life basically sucked. A bunch of bad stuff happened, but then, near the end, the world's in peril. Do I abandon the world that screwed me over my whole life? No. I step up to save the world and die a hero, thus justifying my entire existent and making a really obscure moral point.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Emergency Preparedness
An Open Letter to the Department of Homeland Security
Dear Secretary Michael Chertoff:
It has come to my attention recently that Emergency Preparedness is not as cool as it used to be. It had a great following after 9/11 which continued on throughout 2002, but then people just stopped caring. It made a small comeback after hurricane Katrina, but has since died again.
Emergency Prepardness used to be huge. I remember when the Ready.gov website first appeared. Everyone was talking about it at lunch in high school. Anyone who didn't like it was excluded from the "cool kids" tables. The website is both informative and entertaining. It still brings a great deal of amusement to me when I'm bored and have absolutely nothing better to do. I especially like the illustrations on your "visual guides" for different types of emergencies. They're a cross between the pictures on the safety cards on airplanes and the drawings I used to make in KidPix in elementary school. Your art staff is brilliant and inspired. Also, some of the drawings are completely inconceivable. Sometimes I have to spend a few minutes trying to figure out exactly what they are telling me to do. I suppose that was all part of your plan though. You want to keep people on their toes, so you occasionally throw them a curveball. Very clever, Mr. Chertoff.
Some blame the "Duct Tape and Plastic Sheeting" debacle for effectively killing Emergency Preparedness. I must say, I quite liked "Duct Tape and Plastic Sheeting" myself. I am a firm believer that most problems can indeed be solved with copious amounts of duct tape. I was a little more skeptical about the plastic sheeting, but then I made a list of all the good things you can do with it. You can make a slip-and-slide in the yard, cover your floor and furniture while painting, wrap up a dead body to slow decomposition and cause the police to mess up their time of death (I saw that one on CSI, so it MUST be true). So, after thinking about it for awhile, I decided that plastic sheeting got at least a few cool points for all the things it does. Not nearly as many as duct tape, but then again, that would be very hard.
What Emergency Preparedness needs is a comeback. Perhaps with a nationwide comeback tour (hey, it worked for Madonna... kind of). But what Emergency Preparedness needs is a mascot. Forest fire prevention has Smokey the Bear. Crime prevention has McGruff. We could take a cue from them and make a talking animal mascot, but let's face it, talking animals are kind of creepy and very '80s and '90s. Creepy isn't really the message we want to send with our mascot, and we certainly don't want to be behind the times. Instead, let's take a cue from a type of character that is currently very popular. Superheroes. What Emergency Preparedness needs is a Superhero.
Introducing: EP Man! If he can't survive it, no one can! (We can work on the slogan later.) EP Man would be an awesome Superhero. His costume could change color based upon the current National Threat Advisory level. So, right now, he would be bright yellow, because the threat level is "elevated" (as always). I am tempted to not give him a cape, as I've seen The Incredibles and know that capes generally are a bad idea. However, I think one of those silvery emergency blankets would make a most excellent cape (or perhaps some plastic sheeting...). Every Superhero needs some sort of awesome attack. I think EP Man should through canned-food grenades. Isn't that brilliant? Grenades that look like canned food!
We could make an EP Man TV show. Every episode, their could be a minor disaster (though it could be a major one during Sweeps), and EP Man could save the day with his arsenal of emergency supplies. He shouldn't have superpowers. He should rely solely on his supplies and stuff. He could be like a cross between Batman (except without the whole "uber-rich" thing) and a boyscout (except without the whole "annoying brat" thing). Like Batman, he could have dead parents. Maybe they were killed in a natural disaster. Or maybe they were killed by terrorists for ill-defined reasons (they're terrorists, they don't need reasons).
I hope you will consider my suggestion to help get Emergency Preparedness back to the #1 slot on the Top 40 (that is, if it were a band, or a song, or, you know, anything affiliated with the Top 40 list).
Sincerely,
Artemis
P.S. Let's do lunch sometime this week. I want to tell you about about EP Man's arch-nemesis, ASPI (Airport Security Prohibited Items). She's really scary with her 12-ounce soft-drinks, cigarette lighters, gel shoe inserts, golf clubs, and snow globes. The sheer horror of the snow globes is almost too much to bear. Also, she can turn into a snake... on a plane (an asp, of course).
Dear Secretary Michael Chertoff:
It has come to my attention recently that Emergency Preparedness is not as cool as it used to be. It had a great following after 9/11 which continued on throughout 2002, but then people just stopped caring. It made a small comeback after hurricane Katrina, but has since died again.
Emergency Prepardness used to be huge. I remember when the Ready.gov website first appeared. Everyone was talking about it at lunch in high school. Anyone who didn't like it was excluded from the "cool kids" tables. The website is both informative and entertaining. It still brings a great deal of amusement to me when I'm bored and have absolutely nothing better to do. I especially like the illustrations on your "visual guides" for different types of emergencies. They're a cross between the pictures on the safety cards on airplanes and the drawings I used to make in KidPix in elementary school. Your art staff is brilliant and inspired. Also, some of the drawings are completely inconceivable. Sometimes I have to spend a few minutes trying to figure out exactly what they are telling me to do. I suppose that was all part of your plan though. You want to keep people on their toes, so you occasionally throw them a curveball. Very clever, Mr. Chertoff.
Some blame the "Duct Tape and Plastic Sheeting" debacle for effectively killing Emergency Preparedness. I must say, I quite liked "Duct Tape and Plastic Sheeting" myself. I am a firm believer that most problems can indeed be solved with copious amounts of duct tape. I was a little more skeptical about the plastic sheeting, but then I made a list of all the good things you can do with it. You can make a slip-and-slide in the yard, cover your floor and furniture while painting, wrap up a dead body to slow decomposition and cause the police to mess up their time of death (I saw that one on CSI, so it MUST be true). So, after thinking about it for awhile, I decided that plastic sheeting got at least a few cool points for all the things it does. Not nearly as many as duct tape, but then again, that would be very hard.
What Emergency Preparedness needs is a comeback. Perhaps with a nationwide comeback tour (hey, it worked for Madonna... kind of). But what Emergency Preparedness needs is a mascot. Forest fire prevention has Smokey the Bear. Crime prevention has McGruff. We could take a cue from them and make a talking animal mascot, but let's face it, talking animals are kind of creepy and very '80s and '90s. Creepy isn't really the message we want to send with our mascot, and we certainly don't want to be behind the times. Instead, let's take a cue from a type of character that is currently very popular. Superheroes. What Emergency Preparedness needs is a Superhero.
Introducing: EP Man! If he can't survive it, no one can! (We can work on the slogan later.) EP Man would be an awesome Superhero. His costume could change color based upon the current National Threat Advisory level. So, right now, he would be bright yellow, because the threat level is "elevated" (as always). I am tempted to not give him a cape, as I've seen The Incredibles and know that capes generally are a bad idea. However, I think one of those silvery emergency blankets would make a most excellent cape (or perhaps some plastic sheeting...). Every Superhero needs some sort of awesome attack. I think EP Man should through canned-food grenades. Isn't that brilliant? Grenades that look like canned food!
We could make an EP Man TV show. Every episode, their could be a minor disaster (though it could be a major one during Sweeps), and EP Man could save the day with his arsenal of emergency supplies. He shouldn't have superpowers. He should rely solely on his supplies and stuff. He could be like a cross between Batman (except without the whole "uber-rich" thing) and a boyscout (except without the whole "annoying brat" thing). Like Batman, he could have dead parents. Maybe they were killed in a natural disaster. Or maybe they were killed by terrorists for ill-defined reasons (they're terrorists, they don't need reasons).
I hope you will consider my suggestion to help get Emergency Preparedness back to the #1 slot on the Top 40 (that is, if it were a band, or a song, or, you know, anything affiliated with the Top 40 list).
Sincerely,
Artemis
P.S. Let's do lunch sometime this week. I want to tell you about about EP Man's arch-nemesis, ASPI (Airport Security Prohibited Items). She's really scary with her 12-ounce soft-drinks, cigarette lighters, gel shoe inserts, golf clubs, and snow globes. The sheer horror of the snow globes is almost too much to bear. Also, she can turn into a snake... on a plane (an asp, of course).
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Nostalgia, But Not My Own
College orientation weekend was a little strange for me. I have some connections to Sault Ste. Marie, though none of them are personal. Everything's once-removed.
My parents met in a bar in Sault Ste. Marie. The bar has long since burned down, so now there's a mini-golf place there. The movie theatre downtown is where my parents saw Star Wars (in its original theatrical release). My mom went to the college I'm going to. My dad was stationed at a former Air Force base which is now a civilian airport (where I flew in and out of). One of my best friends was born in Sault Ste. Marie. Her dad was stationed at the Coast Guard base there.
My parents and my friend's parents have stories about places up in the Twin Soos. I drove around for awhile while I was there, looking at stuff. I'd see stuff, like the old hydro-power plant, and remember hearing about it from my mom, or my dad, or my friend's mom. I've only been up to the Soo once before, and that was several years ago, so everything was really very new to me. Yet there was something familiar there, something almost homelike.
My parents met in a bar in Sault Ste. Marie. The bar has long since burned down, so now there's a mini-golf place there. The movie theatre downtown is where my parents saw Star Wars (in its original theatrical release). My mom went to the college I'm going to. My dad was stationed at a former Air Force base which is now a civilian airport (where I flew in and out of). One of my best friends was born in Sault Ste. Marie. Her dad was stationed at the Coast Guard base there.
My parents and my friend's parents have stories about places up in the Twin Soos. I drove around for awhile while I was there, looking at stuff. I'd see stuff, like the old hydro-power plant, and remember hearing about it from my mom, or my dad, or my friend's mom. I've only been up to the Soo once before, and that was several years ago, so everything was really very new to me. Yet there was something familiar there, something almost homelike.
Saturday, June 9, 2007
I love my sister because I'm cool like that.
Got this off of Oddysey's How to Start a Revolution in 21 Days or Less. It's one of those silly meme things. My sentence is rather uneventful. I guess I could change my shirt or something.
Fwd: I sang to a llama because that's how I roll.
Fwd: I smelled Chuck Norris because the voices told me to.
Fwd: I smelled a noodle because I'm sexy and I do what I want.
Fwd: I yelled at my science teacher because I'm sexy and I do what I want.
Subject: I ran over a stuffed animal because Big Bird said to and he's my leader
Work the 3 tables below, then: type out the sentence you end up with in the subject line of a blog post and copy this text. Also, link back to the blog you read it on. DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING ALONE!
Pick the month you were born:
January-------I kicked
February-----I loved
March--------I karate chopped
April----------I licked
May---------- I jumped on
June---------- I smelled
July-----------I did the Macarena With
August-------I had lunch with
September---I danced with
October------I sang to
November----I yelled at
December----I ran over
Pick the day (number) you were born on:
1-------a birdbath
2-------a monster
3-------a phone
4-------a fork
5-------a snowman
6-------a gangster
7-------my cell phone
8-------my dog
9-------my best friends' boyfriend
10-------my neighbor
11---- ---my science teacher
12-------a banana
13-------a fireman
14-------a stuffe d animal
15-------a goat
16-------a pickle
17-------your mom
18---- ---a spoon
19------- a smurf
20-------a baseball bat
21-------a ninja
22-------Chuck Norris
23-------a noodle
24-------a squirrel
25-------a football player
26-------my sister
27-------my brother
28-------an ipod
29-------a surfer
30-------a llama
31-------A homeless guy
Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White---------because I'm cool like that
Black---------because that's how I roll.
Pink----------because I'm NOT crazy.
Red-----------because the voices told me to
Blue----------because I'm sexy and I do what I want.
Green---------because I think I need some serious help.
Purple--------because I'm AWESOME!
Gray----------because Big Bird said to and he's my leader.
Yellow--------because someone offered me 1 ,000,000 dollars
Orange --------because my family thinks I'm stupid anyway.
Brown ---------because I can.
Other---------because I'm a Ninja !
None----------because I can't control myself.
Now type out the sentence you made and put in your subject line and copy the text of this post.
Don't forget to link back to the person that tagged you!
Fwd: I sang to a llama because that's how I roll.
Fwd: I smelled Chuck Norris because the voices told me to.
Fwd: I smelled a noodle because I'm sexy and I do what I want.
Fwd: I yelled at my science teacher because I'm sexy and I do what I want.
Subject: I ran over a stuffed animal because Big Bird said to and he's my leader
Work the 3 tables below, then: type out the sentence you end up with in the subject line of a blog post and copy this text. Also, link back to the blog you read it on. DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING ALONE!
Pick the month you were born:
January-------I kicked
February-----I loved
March--------I karate chopped
April----------I licked
May---------- I jumped on
June---------- I smelled
July-----------I did the Macarena With
August-------I had lunch with
September---I danced with
October------I sang to
November----I yelled at
December----I ran over
Pick the day (number) you were born on:
1-------a birdbath
2-------a monster
3-------a phone
4-------a fork
5-------a snowman
6-------a gangster
7-------my cell phone
8-------my dog
9-------my best friends' boyfriend
10-------my neighbor
11---- ---my science teacher
12-------a banana
13-------a fireman
14-------a stuffe d animal
15-------a goat
16-------a pickle
17-------your mom
18---- ---a spoon
19------- a smurf
20-------a baseball bat
21-------a ninja
22-------Chuck Norris
23-------a noodle
24-------a squirrel
25-------a football player
26-------my sister
27-------my brother
28-------an ipod
29-------a surfer
30-------a llama
31-------A homeless guy
Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White---------because I'm cool like that
Black---------because that's how I roll.
Pink----------because I'm NOT crazy.
Red-----------because the voices told me to
Blue----------because I'm sexy and I do what I want.
Green---------because I think I need some serious help.
Purple--------because I'm AWESOME!
Gray----------because Big Bird said to and he's my leader.
Yellow--------because someone offered me 1 ,000,000 dollars
Orange --------because my family thinks I'm stupid anyway.
Brown ---------because I can.
Other---------because I'm a Ninja !
None----------because I can't control myself.
Now type out the sentence you made and put in your subject line and copy the text of this post.
Don't forget to link back to the person that tagged you!
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
8 Minutes I Will Never Get Back
When my friends and I were in middle school and early high school, we used to make these strange home movies. Some were mildly entertaining, but most were just "aughhh."
Those movies were Oscar-winning compared to this one. I encourage everyone to watch the whole thing, though I warn you, you will NEVER get those 8 minutes of your life back.
I suppose this is what happens when young teenagers try and reenacted a movie that's god-awful already. I have to wonder though, were they trying for awful? I hope they were, because dear god, if they were serious...
Those movies were Oscar-winning compared to this one. I encourage everyone to watch the whole thing, though I warn you, you will NEVER get those 8 minutes of your life back.
I suppose this is what happens when young teenagers try and reenacted a movie that's god-awful already. I have to wonder though, were they trying for awful? I hope they were, because dear god, if they were serious...
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Childhood Strangeness
I was picking out a bag to pack for a weekend trip when I noticed a familiar, small, grey suitcase. It made me smile and remember how strange of a child I really was. You see, the suitcase has a story.
When I was about eight years old, my mom took me and my sister to a yard sale. She said we could each pick out one item, provided it was under a certain value (probably $10 or something). I don't remember exactly what my sister picked out, but I suspect it was fairly normal (like a toy, item of clothing, game, CD or video). I, on the other hand, found a suitcase.
It was a most wondrous suitcase. It is grey and has wheels and a handle. It's relatively small (small enough to carry on a plane; I think it's a 17"), so it was perfect for eight-year-old me. It was a little worn, but it was a very sturdy piece of luggage. I imagined it had gone around the world a few times. I wondered what international treasures it may have held. It was the perfect find.
My mom tried to convince me that I had no need for a suitcase. I already had a duffel bag, and my family owned a couple sets of luggage. My mom even offered to give me a similar piece of luggage out of one of the family sets. I, of course, refused. I wanted this bag. I wanted this special bag.
My mom finally let me get it, with the warning she didn't want to hear me whining later that Laura got something cool and all I had was a dumb suitcase. I never did complain. For several weeks, that suitcase was my favorite "toy". I would fill it with awesome stuff and drag it around the neighborhood. I would pretend I was traveling somewhere far away.
Throughout the years, I have used it for short trips. It always brings a smile to my face when I pull it out of the closet. I'm glad I was a strange kid.
Whatever my sister got was long discarded and forgotten. But I still have my magical suitcase.
When I was about eight years old, my mom took me and my sister to a yard sale. She said we could each pick out one item, provided it was under a certain value (probably $10 or something). I don't remember exactly what my sister picked out, but I suspect it was fairly normal (like a toy, item of clothing, game, CD or video). I, on the other hand, found a suitcase.
It was a most wondrous suitcase. It is grey and has wheels and a handle. It's relatively small (small enough to carry on a plane; I think it's a 17"), so it was perfect for eight-year-old me. It was a little worn, but it was a very sturdy piece of luggage. I imagined it had gone around the world a few times. I wondered what international treasures it may have held. It was the perfect find.
My mom tried to convince me that I had no need for a suitcase. I already had a duffel bag, and my family owned a couple sets of luggage. My mom even offered to give me a similar piece of luggage out of one of the family sets. I, of course, refused. I wanted this bag. I wanted this special bag.
My mom finally let me get it, with the warning she didn't want to hear me whining later that Laura got something cool and all I had was a dumb suitcase. I never did complain. For several weeks, that suitcase was my favorite "toy". I would fill it with awesome stuff and drag it around the neighborhood. I would pretend I was traveling somewhere far away.
Throughout the years, I have used it for short trips. It always brings a smile to my face when I pull it out of the closet. I'm glad I was a strange kid.
Whatever my sister got was long discarded and forgotten. But I still have my magical suitcase.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Life
Know what I love? Life.
I like being alive. I like being able to experience the world. I like existence.
I don't really care why I'm alive. If life is just a scientific chance, then it is amazing. If life was granted to us by some deity, then it is amazing as well.
I love living. I wish I had more than one lifetime to experience the world.
I almost thought I was going to die today. I'm really happy I didn't.
I like being alive. I like being able to experience the world. I like existence.
I don't really care why I'm alive. If life is just a scientific chance, then it is amazing. If life was granted to us by some deity, then it is amazing as well.
I love living. I wish I had more than one lifetime to experience the world.
I almost thought I was going to die today. I'm really happy I didn't.
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